Variation is evil. It must be killed.

I enjoy a rousing leg kick just as much as the next baby. Even an invigorating turn of the head gets my heart aflutter with reckless abandon. But why do you adults insist on movement?

When I get into a comfortable position, leave me be. You're always trying to adjust me or move me. I am what I am. Stop forcing me to conform to your view of comfort. Drooling onto your back while slung over your shoulder is quite cozy. You can clean up the drool once I am ready to move. I promise it will still be there.

And what is this obsession adults have with doodads and gizmos like swings. Here are my thoughts on swings:



Any questions?