I was fast asleep dreaming I was part of Matt Kenseth's pit crew and we were at Daytona and the rest of the pit crew were Dallas Cowgirls. When I woke up I checked my security systems and found pictures of my mother cutting off the ends of my fingernails. When I confronted her with the evidence, she denied any malicious intent saying "It was for your own good" and "Your nails will get to be too long." Yeah, right, sure. Next she's going to be coming for my hair.
I think I'm being raised for body parts. It's like in the Matrix when people are used as power processing plants. My parents are Agent Smith and I'm Neo. Next time she tries giving me that stuff in the dropper, I'm gonna spit it right back out. It's probably some mind altering substance like fluoride or aspartame. If I hear the words "Soylent Green" I'm outta here.
Need I say more:
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